Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I wish i was in the wii world.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
