But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
