the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
