My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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