yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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