I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
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My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
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Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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