i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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