I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
A+ Viking dick
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
