His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
