No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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