that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
