i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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