I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
