worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
