Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
