OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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