I could have mohawked her pubes.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
