With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
