I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
