I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
did i just pee glitter
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize