Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
