fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
ttyl tear gas
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
