Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
