Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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