She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
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