ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
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