the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
