yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
