You're so nebulous sometimes
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
