Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
