Dude my mom stole all your condoms
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
