party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
