You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
