I only kidnapped one of them. chill
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Everclear isn't food dammit
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
