proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
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