if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
