yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
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