Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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