he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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