When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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