did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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