Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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