D3 body, D1 cock
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Enjoy the penises
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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