Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize