I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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