i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize