the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
