I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
