Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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