This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
